President party

I'm late to the party on this one ...

I still think Darrell Hammond's portrayal of Bill Clinton is the best of the bunch.

In case you missed it this week, check out Funny Or Die's latest viral hit ...

Funny or Die's Presidential Reunion from Will Ferrell

Sunday reading

Hope you had a good Thanksgiving ...

Here's some of the stories I took an interest in during the last week ...

Sports ...
a Mitchell thinks drug use down in MLB
a In Detroit, Tradition Takes a Hike

Music ...
a 2008 American Music Awards: The Best and Worst
a Digital Sales Surpass CDs at Atlantic
a Austin tries to keep title of 'live music capital'

Movies ...a 'Christmas Story' fans celebrate film's 25th year
a Chenoweth Has Christmas Covered ... Ah, Kristin Chenoweth. Chirpy!
Politics ...
a Obama team delivers a changeup in news conference seating
a Barack Obama chafes inside the 'bubble'
a BlackBerry vs. the bubble
a Change From the Top
a The true school scandala Send Bill Clinton to the Senate
a Obama steps forcefully into vacuum
a White House Manual Details How to Deal With Protesters
a The White House: An Operating Manual

Media & the Internet ...
a Facebook broke my heart ... I'll admit it, there are old girlfriends and flames on my Facebook. Each hold a special part of my past, and it's been a thrill for me to reconnect with them, too, and see what they're doing now ... But there are lines you shouldn't cross.
a Friends in a Facebook World
a Online networks have rendered reunions obsolete
a Dine-and-dash gang nabbed via Facebook ... From my friend Raechel.
a Woman who won a date is suing Waukegan radio station ... This is crazy. Why, why why! would the radio station not do a background check on the guy!?
a Woman Guilty of Minor Charges for MySpace Hoax ... Crazy, interesting stuff.
a A Penny for My Thoughts?

Technology ...a No Keyboard? And You Call This a BlackBerry?

Life & other stuff ...a The Car of the Future -- but at What Cost?
a Back to the old toy box: In hard times, parents and retailers turn to tried-and-true favorites
a Reducing costs 1 word at a time
a A president named Obama changes the name game
a Frank Gehry: The Starchitect's Best Work May Turn Out Not to Look Much Like Him
a Louisville drops Who-ville Christmas display at behest of Dr. Seuss lawyers
a Area Man Shocked To See His Elementary School Has A Website ... From The Onion.

Sunday reading

... So I got my ice skating fix today. Woo hoo! ... It's not a Wisconsin winter without getting on the frozen pond at least once a year ...

That was the highlight of the day. Here was the lowlight ...

When I put my contacts in this morning, I knew immediately something wasn't right. And when I went back to the bathroom to try adjusting them, I didn't do much good ... Nevertheless, I pressed on, and Kates and I attended church, even though I was having so much trouble seeing out of my right eye I could barely make out the words in the hymnal ...

I tried adjusting them once more after we got home. But now the contact in my right eye was stuck to my eyeball -- I thought. I must've dumped almost half a bottle of saline solution on my eye to try getting it out, but nothing seemed to work. Ok, that can happen, I thought, I'll just try to get through the rest of the afternoon and hope it dries out enough that it just falls out ...

So we went ice skating ... And once we returned home again, I was back at it, trying to get that contact out of my right eye. I tried more saline solution. More rubbing my eye ... By the time Kates and I ate supper tonight, I was in such inexplicable pain and agony. I had practically gouged my eye ...

Only to realize at about 8:30 tonight that the contact lense I had been trying to fix all day was never in my eye ...

Oh, the pain and suffering.

Here's some of the good reads that piqued my interest during the last week ...

Sports ...
a Wrigley Field would get new neighbors under developer's proposal for hotel, apartments ... ugh.
a Lets stop pretending Wrigleyville is perfect ... I think this guy is a Sox fan.
a Albert Pujols still angry over being linked to Mitchell Report on steroids ... I'll give him the benefit of the doubt -- and I love the guy, really. But honestly, I was kind of surprised not to see his name on the list ...
a Deal with it: Bud is staying
a Brady's world an altar-nate universe
a Cardinals' unique stadium set to take center stage at Super Bowl

Politics ...
a How Will We Survive Another Year ... this one's a little old, but still relevant.
a Tribune endorses Obama
a The Kennedys embrace Obama
a The man behind the message: When Sen. Barack Obama gets behind a podium, he’s got a 26-year-old speechwriter to thank for his powerful words
a Obama's misuse of history
a Debate gets fiercely personal
a Why stop short? The Clintons are lying about Obama's remarks on Reagan
a A Clinton twofer's high price ... Great column. One thing I've learned in life is good times can rarely be duplicated ...
a President Heckler ... more great commentary on Bill.
a Billary's Adventures in Primaryland ... and more.
a The politics of personality: Do you like these people?
a Transformer candidates: It's amazing to watch the presidential contenders bend and twist into whatever they need to be

Entertainment ...
a Garth Brooks is almost the retiring sort
a Grammy-nominated videos include Feist, Johnny Cash ... The Feist video and Mute Math's "Typical" are by far the videos of the year ...
a Marketers announce ad lineup for Super Bowl
a Marketers going all out to make impression on Super Bowl audience
a NBC's new `Lipstick Jungle' similar to ABC's `Cashmere Mafia,' but neither series measures up ... Too bad. And yet, not surprising. We're still watching "Mafia," but it's starting to wear thin ...
a Ritter's family says he didn't have to die ... very interesting.
a Southern-bred actress has field day with role of devious co-worker ... Angela Kinsey rocks.

Life & other stuff ...
a Dubious title for O'Hare: World's most flight cancellations
a 10 Things Your IT Department Won't Tell You

The Onion ...

Brett Favre Still Taking Post-Game Shower

GREEN BAY, WI—The Packers confirmed Wednesday evening that quarterback Brett Favre had yet to emerge from the Lambeau Field locker-room shower...

Onion reads

Bill Clinton: 'Screw It, I'm Running For President'

CHARLESTON, SC—"My fellow Americans, I am sick and tired of not being president," Clinton announced while introducing his wife at a "Hillary '08" rally...

Jessica Simpson Completes Elaborate Plan To Destroy Cowboys' Season

DALLAS—Speaking to reporters she had invited into her impenetrable subterranean Texas lair on Monday, Jessica Simpson gloated over the victory she recently achieved after nearly two years of using her personal charms, her unique brand of...

Sports Through With Helping New Orleans Recover

NEW ORLEANS—Following this year's BCS National Championship game, held in New Orleans' Louisiana Superdome, commissioners from all amateur...

Sunday reading

Some of the stories that caught my eyes during the last week ...

Music ...
a All I Want for Christmas Is Not To Hear That Song

TV ...
a Schulz: The Good and The Grief ... Admittedly, this story is past due (and I did watch the program; it was pretty darn good). But it's still a worthy read.
a TV breeds the new male star

Baseball ...
a If they hear it once, they'll hear it 100 times: It's been a century since Cubs' last title
a Fukudome is a quality import
a State looks to buy Wrigley

Politics ...
a As a Republican, I'm on the Fringe
a Bill and Hillary Clinton’s Pitch in Iowa: ‘I Love the ’90s’
a The Front-Runners: Understanding the Leading Presidential Candidates
a The Ghost of a Father
a Obama's Cheering Section Ups The Volume
a The two Andrew Jacksons: Was 'Old Hickory' a great president or an American Hitler?
a A Miracle on Pennsylvania Avenue

The Internet and media ...
a About Facebook! Forward March! Scholars Are Falling Into Line to Maneuver Through New Territory
a News flash: Donald Trump sells Brooklyn Bridge
a The wide open world of widgets
a Gathering news not only for the next day but for now

Life and other stuff ...
a Chicago ... without us
a Granny Got Game: Wii's Move-Around Style Appeals to a New Demographic
a Expecting The Expenses: $25 Diapers, $12,000 for Day Care, And What to Do About College?
a Study finds humans still evolving, and quickly
a Study: Why Pregnant Women Don't Topple
a 6 tales of financial revenge
a The Elite Apple Corps: A Hundred Million Strong, Every One of Them Cool
a Riding the zip line at Moaning Cavern in California

Sunday reading

... Talk about a crazy week ...

... On the heels of my dream week of baseball last week, last Saturday started a string of eight straight days of rain. Not a sprinkle -- long, hard, pouring rain. Luckily Kates and I escaped with only a trickl of water in our basement ... The rest of our area wasn't so lucky, and much of the land to the west of us remained flooded with numerous roads closed and the rivers at record heights ...

... All of that made for a somewhat chaotic and sometimes tense work week ... To ease the tension a littke bit, one of my cohorts delivered this radio snippet ... I'd already heard it a few times before, but it'll have you laughing every time!

Here's some of the headlines and stories that caught my eye during the last week ...

Baseball ...
a Froemming has called 'em like he's seen 'em
a Bouton gives fans a real 'old-timer's day'
a Bonds' uncharted universe: 755 and beyond
a Home run record may bring Bonds neither respect nor adulation
a Angels' Anderson bombs Yankees with 10 RBI
a Gloveless hitters buck the trend
a Happy returns: Cleveland Indians acquire well-traveled Lofton in trade with Texas Rangers ... apparently this happened a month ago, but I just caught it this week. Poor Kenny ... though if he's anywhere, it's good to see him in Cleveland.
a A half-century ago, a baseball era ended in New York and another started in California

Internet & Media ...
a In Month Before Labor Day, Pointless 'Filler' Columns Abound ... so HA-larious. So true.
a Playboy courts college students with online site ... now this is a new one ...
a It came from outer space

Politics ...
a Bill Clinton in '08!
a It's all about priorities for Michelle Obama
a Obama: Presidential Bid at Times Insane ... Kates and I caught this Daily Show. Awesome.
a Huckabee: a Republican who can lead us back home

Entertainment ...
a Her book is Hollywood, according to Courtney
a MTV’s ‘Sweet 16’ show drives fad for lavish birthday parties ... this is just insane ...
a La-La Land lets Lindsay Lohan off easy ... this is insane too ...
a Put the Kids in Bed and Close the Door, the Real Bob Saget Is in the House

Music ...
a This Furniture Rocks
a Music-Selling Rivals Take Aim at iTunes

Other stuff ...
a Cellphone Contracts: Hard to Get off the Hook
a One in Four Read No Books Last Year
a Certified Guaranty Co. puts comics on a slab

Another Saturday night

Weeks of waiting and anticipation came to a head last night.

Kates and I saw Frank Caliendo. Live. In Concert. At the splendid Riverside Theater in Milwaukee.

Any review I write would hardly do the justice of seeing his live show, so I’m going to kill myself putting a lot of thought into this post. I’ve never found it easy to give a full synopsis on a standup routine, because the jokes never come out the way they were told in the first place.

I will tell you Caliendo’s Bush impersonation was impeccable; it was every bit as good as I had hoped it would be. It seemed as though he spent more than half the show doing our fearless -- ?? -- leader. Caliendo poked fun at Bush’s facial expressions, like the constant smirk that he has on his face, or the face he makes when he enters a press conference looking as though he just heard a dirty joke backstage and wants to share it with the audience. Or the way Bush adds “ify” or “ificate” to words in an attempt to sound smarter (“We have to thinkificate hard about our strategy in Iraq”). And when Bush is trying to emphasize a point, he’ll bob his head -- like a turkey. As though he should be adding a “gobble, gobble” at the end of his sentences …

Caliendo touched briefly on vice president Cheney (comparing him to The Penguin) before transitioning into Bill Clinton impressions … “Bill Clinton could be standing up here right now and say anything, and we’d believe him,” Caliendo said. Then, switching into Clinton’s gravely voice and raising the signature thumbs-up, he says, “I am not here right now.”

Caliendo did Yoda. He did Al Pacino (which I didn't think was very good ...). He did Andy Rooney. He did Jeff Goldblum. He did Jay Leno.

But, of course, 99.9 percent of the audience was there to see him do his infamous John Madden impressions.

It seemed as though we’d already been watching him for hours when Caliendo finally said, “Well I’ve decided to not do any more John Madden impressions …” To which the crowd responded with a loud “awwwwwww …” To which Caliendo responded by acting as if his body was being shot up with a shotgun. HA-larious … And out came the Madden impressions.

As usual, Caliendo’s Madden routine was built around Madden’s supposed obsession with Brett Favre -- a notion that was even more entertaining considering Caliendo was performing to a Wisconsin audience -- and Madden’s knack for saying things that either don’t make any sense or are blatantly obvious (“If the quarterback throws the ball, and the receiver catches it in the end zone, it’s going to be a touchdown!”)

And before you know it, Caliendo is weaving all of his impressions together in laugh-til-you-cry conversations between Bush, Clinton, Madden and whoever else enters the room in his mind.

Admittedly, Caliendo did appear to be running out of material toward the end of the show, and the crowd seemed to be getting restless (… At one point, I envisioned a Michael Richards scenario unfolding as some audience members annoyingly yelled out impressions and garbled requests. But to Caliendo’s credit he reacted with patience and wit, at one point responding to a fan -- in his Madden character -- “There’s a guy that needs to let me do the rest of my show!” … ) Whether that was by design or not, we won’t know, but it also made for one of the funniest moments of the night as Caliendo suddenly stopped and sighed, “I’m tired.“ Then he layed down on the stage and, after a few moments of silence and staring at the ceiling, he raised his arm, still lying flat on his back, and began making hand puppets in the spotlights. And moments later he turned it into a Muppets impression, using his hand as Kermit the Frog singing “Rainbow Connection.” Again, HA-larious.

Finally, Caliendo ended with his comical impression of Robin Williams in “The Wizard of Oz.” Kates and I had seen it before on his Letterman gigs, but it didn’t fail in bringing a smile to our face again …

Check out these Frank Caliendo performances ...





* * *

Since we went to an early show, Kates and I caught a dinner afterward at The Chancery (Caesar salad, steak, homemade mashed potatoes, the best vegetable salad I’ve had … mmm, mmm, gooood!)

… And then we settled in for a viewing of “Friday Night Lights,” which I had to watch for a Sunday School Lesson …

Good film ...

But I guess I was expecting more of an exploitative look at Texas high school football … The film, of course, stars Billy Bob Thornton as the coach of the vaunted Permian Panthers High School football team in Odessa, Texas. The film, which is based on the book and true story of the 1988 Permian team, follows the team as the boys face the pressures and hopes of a community that’s expecting them to win the state championship. Most of the boys on the team know little else but football …

I thought the acting was wonderful and the scenes put you right smack in the middle of Odessa as it was in the fall of 1988. And I loved the shaky-camera, documentary feel of the film … I was, however, turned off by the overdramatic, repeated practice and game scenes of players slamming into each other, guys flipping over each other and all of it capped with the sounds of guys groaning. Classic football cliches -- squared.

But, every once in awhile you get a DVD where the extras are truly fun to watch and do their job in enhancing your perspective of the film. So was the case with “Friday Night Lights,” which offered a short documentary featuring actual game footage, photos, and interviews with the players and people that lived the story in 1988. It was great seeing and hearing from the real Boobie Miles, Mike Winchel and Don Billingsley, and the home video footage of their playing days elevated the mystique of their story ...

Good reads

Sometimes fun, mostly just interesting and insightful reads from the last week and beyond ...

Cubs stuff...
a Why Cubs deep-sixed in '06
a Depression in a shade of Blue ... by buddy Matt (he's a Mets fan ...) sent me this one. If you're a Cubs fan you can relate ...

Baseball stuff...
a Absence of 20-game winners: emerging trend or statistical anomaly?
a Fun stats, facts enliven baseball

Baseball from The Onion ...
a Bud Selig Nervously Informs Ozzie Guillen That White Sox Aren't Making Playoffs
a Frank Thomas Credits Recent Power Surge To Steroids
a Trevor Hoffman: 'I Want To Be A Hall Of Famer Right Now'

Politics ...
a A textbook definition of cowardice ... Keith Olbermann comments on Bill Clinton's Fox News interview ... you hate to play the blame game with who was more responsible for not stopping the 9/11 attacks, but watching Bill Clinton lash out earlier this week was bliss ... ... and seriously. It was not an attack on journalists. Whah, whah, whah ...


Entertainment ...
a Absurd TV ... the things we hardly seem to notice about our favorite TV shows ...
a "Itsy Bitsy" mistake: Songwriter still alive ... oops! More proof that what goes around comes around ...
a The French and Germans have remade the BBC series. Why?
a He's just a Jersey Joe ... good stuff on Zach Braff.
a 'Cause I said so ... John Mayer’s musings
a 'Sunshine' star shines as a sweet kid

Other stuff ...
a These Badgers exhibit band loyalty ... undoubtedly one of the greatest marching bands in the world. The story of their boot camps and loyalty is legend ...
a Microsoft's Zune player to cost $249.99 ... I'm not buying it. The iPod rules the world. And don't even get me started on Microsoft software ...