Only in Portland Would the Airport's Carpet Reach Cult Status

Seeing this makes me sad I've never visited the Portland airport to experience this cool carpet ...

Legion hall collapses to rubble

Now here's one I got a good chuckle from as I read it this morning ...

In short, a local American Legion hall collapsed Sunday night, suffering from old age as so many buildings are.

It took only a few seconds around suppertime on Sunday
for decades of tradition and history to crash into rubble
along Main Street in Burlington Junction.

Sad story. But what threw me was this quote from one of the Legion members ...

"We knew it was going to happen, we just didn't know when."

Deeper in the news story, there's another gem of a reporting.

While on his way to Shenandoah, Iowa, around 10:30 a.m. Sunday, Bragg said he noticed that a section of brickwork, perhaps six feet by ten feet, had crumbled away from the structure's east wall. He didn't think much about it and went on his way.

Why the heck were these guys still using the building!?

Why weren't they repairing it!?

Why weren't they gathering up all of their history and memorabilia and putting it somewhere for safe keeping!?

German celeb bunny meets untimely demise

This poor bunny never heard the reporter coming. ...

Rapture Day

So much for the world ending yesterday ...

I was in sweet slumber until about 10 a.m. and woke up to the adorableness that is Phoebe at my bedside, shouting "Daddy, wake up!" while she flipped the covers off of me and tugged at my leg. The sun was shining, too.

I spent the bulk of what was a gorgeous Saturday in The 'Ville working in our yard. Mowing, trimming and really starting to set the stage for what I hope will soon be a yard full of colorful gardens. I told Kates when I finally came inside Saturday night, "Working in the yard this weekend, I feel like it's officially on."

I stayed outside to clean up some brush and watched as the sky turn ominous in the west. ... Sure enough, we were hit with a good thunderstorm, and a tornado warning about an hour later.

But nothing materialized. And the world didn't end.

If there was any punishment to be issued, Kates and I got it overnight -- in the form of Phoebe refusing to go to bed and then waking up nearly every hour of the night. I woke up with a headache, and Kates was concerned enough about Phoebe that she convinced me we needed to take her to visit a doctor ...

So we scrapped our church plans and instead packed the car for a day in St. Joe. Kates and I had hoped to do some shopping this weekend anyway.

The doctor confirmed our suspicions that Phoebe had attracted another case of strep throat. Third time in the last four months! ... Not to mention she was coming off yet another ear infection. The girl has spent far too much time on antibiotics and prescription medicine this last year. Don't get us started on the lack of cleanliness at her preschool.

Oh, but the shopping was good. ... From our family time with Toy Story 3 Friday night to today's road trip, the gorgeous weather throughout -- it's been a wonderful weekend.

Even better, the world didn't end.

Meant to be

In the too-cool-not-to-post category ...

EASTON, Pa. (AP) -- An engaged eastern Pennsylvania couple were born on the same day in the same hospital - and their mothers even shared a room in the maternity ward.

Amy Singley and Steven Smith were born at St. Luke's Hospital in Fountain Hill on April 17, 1986.

After the mothers were hospital roommates, the two families continued to interact through their church in Easton. Smith asked Singley on a date to the movies when they were sophomores in high school.

Singley says she knew Smith was the right guy for her after their second date. She says people are convinced the 24-year-olds were "destined to be together."

They plan to get married June 12.

Running down the Lord

I caught this one in one of my slew of news alerts today ... It's too good not to share ....

Lord Jesus Christ hit by Mass. car

NORTHAMPTON, Mass. (AP) -- The victim might have forgiven the woman who ran him down in a Massachusetts crosswalk, but police haven't.

Police say a Pittsfield woman has been cited for running down a man named Lord Jesus Christ as he crossed a street in Northampton on Tuesday.

The 50-year-old man is from Belchertown. Officers checked his ID and discovered that, indeed, his legal name is Lord Jesus Christ. He was taken to the hospital for treatment of minor facial injuries. (more)

Yeah, right

I stopped my Sunday Reading posts long ago ...

But these were too good to not post them here ...

First, from The Boston Globe ... Do we need a new punctuation mark?

Then, there's this one from John Feinstein -- about a proposal that deserves one of those SarcMarks. Feinstein makes an excellent case against a 96-team field, which, unfortunately like everything these days, is being fueled by money.

The 64-team field (Seriously. The 65th team is not part of the field ... ) is one of the most perfect numbers in all of sports. Adding more teams, which would mean more games spread over a longer period, would only dilute the tournament and turn off viewers. The notion of ESPN seizing the tournament and likely moving a chunk of the games to cable also would limit the scope of fans that make the tournament such a national event -- on CBS!.

Hey, I love Big Monday on ESPN ... But the notion of cable television's version of the New York Yankees owning the tournament makes my skin crawl.

I'd rather not imagine a tournament without Jim Nantz and Billy Packer calling the games. Or a tournament with ESPN replacing the sweet "One Shining Moment" montage with some god-awful super-charged montage -- that moves so fast it hurts your eyes -- set to a Rihanna song.

Ugh.

While I'm at it, here's the "One Shining Moment" video from 2008 -- after one of the greatest games ever! ... It still brings tears to my eyes.

Woman breaks off long nails

From the Associated Press's " Well, duh ..." wire ...

Woman says life easier after breaking long nails.

Just reading this story makes me uncomfortable ... Like the feeling of nails scratching a chalkboard.

The story behind the squirrel photo

Have you seen this?

At first, I questioned it, too ...

But the couple says it's real ...

Great stuff.

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

A moment in time

While most people were probably hitting the snooze button, pulling the sheets over their shoulders and grasping tightly to some final hours of sleep this morning, I had the assignment of joining a couple dozen spirited souls who woke early and gathered for a moment in time.

While you were sleeping, this morning held a rare numerical occurrence that — depending how technical you want to get — happens once in a millennium. The moment came at six seconds after 4:05 a.m.

Combine the time and date and you have a sequential order of 04:05:06 07-08-09.

Under a full moon, I met the group of about 20 local residents -- I was pleasantly surprised at the number, around 3:45 a.m. in a city park. A clock counted down the minutes and seconds on a laptop, while pastries and coffee, provided by a local coffee shop, were spread on a picnic table. Some came dressed in their pajamas. Dogs came, too.

As the moment approached, the group joined in a countdown of the final seconds. Then, they erupted in cheers and laughter before returning to their conversing over coffee.

There were no signs of The Apocalypse. The computer didn’t explode. Aliens didn’t descend from the sky to attack. Nobody was hurt.

To be fair to other numbers geeks out there, Father Time offers up a sequential moment in each of the next six years. Although Wednesday’s exact sequence won’t occur again until 3009, a different sequence will be marked an hour later next year at 5:06:07 a.m. on Aug. 9.

Internet sites have posted the ensuing sequences on their virtual calendars with the last one occurring at 9:10:11 a.m. on Dec. 13, 2014.

Others, I learned, marked the sequential time at 12:34:56 7-8-9. I would argue, however, that sequence is a stretch because it doesn't conform to a standard dd-mm-yy timestamp. And nobody says " ... in the year '9." Again, a technicality.

The organizers of this morning's local event already are planning for next year. They were handing out “save the date” fliers for the Second Annual Sequential Gathering.

The world spins madly on

I had a day off from work on Monday. So I dropped off Phoebe at the daycare and did a few errands before heading home …

It’s worth noting I hate going to Wal-mart. Everything about it annoys me. The impatient and ornery crowds. The long lines. The incompetent clerks. The corporate reputation and labor practices. Pretty much the whole atmosphere.

So I try to avoid the store at all costs.

But I needed a couple household items. I was in the area. And it was early enough in the day that I thought I’d brave it …

I walked through the doors at almost exactly 8 a.m. The store was nearly empty of customers; a group of employees were having some sort of morning pep rally in the jewelry section. This is interesting, I thought, I may have finally found a decent time that I can sort of stand coming to this place.

Think again.

When I got ready to check out a large, middle-aged, black woman -- it's just a description, people -- was chewing out an employee and threatening to call the corporate office because there were only two registers open. At one of them, the clerk’s machine wasn’t accepting credit cards; at the other the clerk was too busy talking to pay attention to the customer who was now chewing out the employee …

Finally, the woman went to the register that wasn’t accepting credit cards, ranting and grumbling all the way through the line while I fell in behind her.

I had planned to pay with a credit card. But under the circumstances, I paid cash and got the heck out of there.

* * *

Kates and I have been gradually returning to our celebrated Chinese food nights … The kind we used to have all the time before we had Phoebe, Kates’s blood pressure skyrocketed, we went on a low-sodium diet for a few months and the economy went so sour that we cut back on a lot of unnecessary purchases. Like Chinese food.

When times were good, it seemed sometimes as though we were single-handedly keeping that place down the street in business.

And now we’re back baby!

Kates called in the order, and I headed out to pick it up.

As I paid for our order tonight, the Chinese girl whose always working the counter but whose name I do not know says, “Haven’t seen you in awhile.”

Somewhat surprised that she’d noticed -- but then again, not really -- I answered “Ah, yeah, we’ve been around … We’ve just been cutting back I guess, with the economy and all.”

“Yeah, a lot of people have been doing that,” the girl said.

She swiped my debit card, had me sign the receipt and handed me our paper bag of wonderfully smelling, mouth-watering piles of delicous-ness.

“Well, it was good to see you again.”

“Yeah, you too,” I said before heading out the door.

I thought it was classic. When I told Kates at home, she burst out laughing.

* * *

Highlights from a stack of police reports I read this morning …

Firefighters extinguished a small fire on an elementary school tennis court. Someone had built the fire with oatmeal and cheese.

A bunch of kids jumped another kid in a gas station parking lot and knocked him unconscious. When police asked the ringleader why he did it, the kid said he just didn’t like the other boy and he was having a bad day.

A man heard a car door slam outside his house and looked through the window to see a burglar inside his truck. So the man grabbed his car keys and repeatedly pressed the remote lock button to contain the burglar in the truck until police arrived.

A couple of men were caught lighting fireworks outside an apartment complex at 1:30 in the morning. When police asked them if they knew possessing fireworks was illegal, let alone why they were lighting them at 1:30 a.m., the men were dumbfounded.

And a mother refused to buy her son a dog. So he went ballistic, trashed his sisters’ rooms, flipped mattresses, smashed things on dressers and then ran outside and threatened to shoot up the house.

Burning time

Sorry for the lack of posts lately, folks. Like I told my mother last night: I haven’t had a whole lot to say lately.

That, and I’ve sort of been overwhelmed with other projects. Mostly a burst of new tools, and initiatives, and programming that no one seemed remotely interested in a few months ago. Now some of the things I’ve envisioned and wanted for so long are finally starting to gain some footing. Exciting, for sure. But some of it’s happening so fast I feel like I’m barely keeping up.

That said, no “American Idol” tonight. I called for a break so I could work on some of my other projects and we’ll try to catch it on our DVR tomorrow night. Some time between dinner and “Lost.” …

Frankly, I’m also going through a phase right now where the last thing I want to do at night when I get home is watch TV. Unless it’s Wednesday night and “Lost” is on … I already quit “Heroes,” and I’m giving some thought to breaking it off with “Grey’s Anatomy,” too … Some days I’m so tired and clogged from listening to people chattering all day at work that the sound of a television could push me to insanity.

So tonight I’ve been listening to my iPod almost since the time I arrived home. And it’s awesome.

Here’s one little story about an interesting segment of my day, though …

It happened around 1:30 this afternoon. I had just returned from an assignment and barely taken my seat when the emergency tones went off. Dispatch was getting multiple calls about a lot of thick smoke in one neighborhood, and it appeared to be a trailer on fire …

I sighed, got back to my feet and headed out the door again … Only, in my haste I misheard the address. I started driving toward 16th Street when I should’ve been heading toward 68th. It wasn’t ’til I got close to 16th and saw no signs of a fire that I called back to my editor and double-checked the address. He had heard 68th Street, and I turned around … Dang.

Halfway there, I was stopped for a red light at one of the city’s major intersections, in the middle of the city. I’m biding my time, listening to the radio when I look up to my left and see one of these. … Oh God, that’s a spot I didn’t know existed. I faced forward and couldn’t turn my head again, half wondering if the people in the car next to me were doing double-takes …

By the time I got to the fire scene, the firefighters were rolling up their hoses. I was met first by a police officer who was on our burglary case. Any time I see any of the guys on that case, they still ask about it …

In the back yard of the home, I found a couple investigators jotting notes and a burly man dressed in flannel and looking befuddled in front of the charred RV … One of the investigators looks at me and says “Space heater,” while pointing to the charred and melted remnants resting on the patio.

As the story went, the man had last been in his RV, which was parked in his tiny back yard -- the rear of it was practically butted against his porch and the front was almost touching the garage -- about two weeks ago. The thing had junk piled to its roof, and the owner left the space heater turned on -- plugged into an old extension chord.

Space heater. Old chord. Lots of junk. Fire.

As I talked to the man, he told me he smelled the smoke but he thought it was from the hamburger he’d just made. Then his neighbor knocked on the door and asked “Do you know your trailer’s on fire?”

The end of the world as we know it?

... Before I go for what could be my last night of sleep on this Earth ...

Here's a story I caught on the NBC News tonight ...

It seems a group of researchers have constructed a 17-mile tunnel under Switzerland -- a "particle-smasher," they're calling it -- to try to learn how the universe formed. But, the story goes, it "could create microscopic black holes that some fear would gobble up the planet."

There's also an interactive about the thing on msnbc.com.

Here is the segment from NBC News tonight -- minus Brian Williams' quip that closed the segment and the newscast: "Let's hope they know what they're doing."

Sweet dreams.

(By the way, I watched the Cubs lose tonight, and now the Reds have finally taken a lead on the Brewers in the 11th inning of their game. Seriously, what gives? Does anyone want to win the NL Central?)

Comedy central

This one comes compliments of my friend Matt ...

This is beyond hilarious. How a TV news station managed to air this -- no, how did the reporter not burst out laughing as he read the letter?! There must have been a 102 takes to get this story right ...

Sunday reading

Here's some good reads that have caught my eyes the last couple weeks ...

Baseball ...
a A squeeze at Wrigley
a Multiple firms may be part of rights deal
a Steroids In America: The Godfather

Politics ...
a Pro-Clinton? ‘SNL’ Says You’re Joking
a Decriminalize prostitution

a Spitzer's Troubles Ready-Made for Jokes

TV ...

a Britney Spears meets Barney, plus much more on 'How I Met Your Mother'

Media & the Internet ...
a Facebook is doomed
a Virtual friends too much like work
a Wikipedia's tin-cup approach wears thin

a Signing Off at XM: Radio Innovator To Try His Hand At Tribune Co.
a Black TV Crew Attacked While Filming ... and in case you haven't seen it, here's the video.

Life & other stuff ...
a Former president gave campus new identity ... This one was personal. A man who's legacy I really admired and the chance I had to interview him and his wife on Valentine's Day in 2001 was a big highlight for me ...
a Kansas woman sat on toilet for two years
a Parent-teacher talks can get heated
a We Really Need a Staycation

Mom sells rule-breaking son's car

This is classic ...

Jane Hambleton has dubbed herself the "meanest mom on the planet."

After finding alcohol in her son's car, she decided to sell the car and share her 19-year-old's misdeed with everyone — by placing an ad in the local newspaper. The ad reads: "OLDS 1999 Intrigue. Totally uncool parents who obviously don't love teenage son, selling his car. Only driven for three weeks before snoopy mom who needs to get a life found booze under front seat. $3,700/offer. Call meanest mom on the planet."

Hambleton has heard from people besides interested buyers since recently placing the ad in The Des Moines Register.

The 48-year-old from Fort Dodge says she has fielded more than 70 telephone calls from emergency room technicians, nurses, school counselors and even a Georgia man who wanted to congratulate her. "The ad cost a fortune, but you know what? I'm telling people what happened here," Hambleton says. "I'm not just gonna put the car for resale when there's nothing wrong with it, except the driver made a dumb decision. "It's overwhelming the number of calls I've gotten from people saying 'Thank you, it's nice to see a responsible parent.' So far there are no calls from anyone saying, 'You're really strict. You're real overboard, lady.'"

The only critic is her son, who Hambleton says is "very, very unhappy" with the ad and claims the alcohol was left by a passenger.

Hambleton believes her son but has decided mercy isn't the best policy in this case. She says she set two rules when she bought the car at Thanksgiving: No booze, and always keep it locked.

The car has been sold, but Hambleton says she will continue the ad for another week — just for the feedback.

Car Crashes into ABC7 Chicago Studio

I heard about this on the radio this morning ... I'm sorry I missed it!



Here's a story from the Sun-Times about the crash.

The best shoplifting story ever!

So the other day I was reviewing police reports and came across this ...

The arrest of a 20-year-old man who was supposed to be watching out for thieves at a Target store was now facing charges as a thief himself. Local police had arrested a loss prevention officer after other loss prevention officers discovered he was stealing merchandise from the store.

According to a police report, the store’s loss prevention officers became suspicious of the man earlier this month when an inventory check showed an iPod was missing. Surveillance video showed the man taking an iPod to the store’s loss prevention office and then going to a corner where surveillance video was unavailable ...

A few days later, loss prevention officers installed another camera in the office and captured the man stealing another iPod, in addition to clothes, CDs and DVDs. Videos showed the man packing the items into a backpack and then leaving the store with them after his shift ...

After being confronted, the man admitted to stealing more than $1,000 worth of merchandise during three different shifts. During an interview with police he reportedly said he had a feeling his boss had been watching him more closely, but he continued stealing anyway ...

Idiot.

Lego man washes ashore

I caught this on the news tonight ... pretty amusing ...

A funny sign

A funny sign I saw earlier today ...